George Hartwell M.Sc.
Articles > counselling > Core Issues - Part 2
George holds a Masters of Science degree in clinical psychology but he is not a registered Psychologist and is not eligible for most insurance programs. George practices as a counselor or therapist.
Christian Counselling, Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Office: Suite
#125 - 1454 Dundas St. East, Mississauga. Postal Code: L4X 1L4.
Core Issues - Part 2
Core Issues and the Human Spirit
© George Hartwell, 2012, all rights reserved
People have core issues often baffle others and themselves. No one understands why some people have problems attaining to emotional and spiritual maturity. It is unclear why habits and sin problems are so hard to break. Why is it that they do not maintain deliverance or healings?
Usually with core issues there are some severe attachment wounds from early childhood. Events prenatal, at birth or in the early years may be involved - something that blocked healthy bonding between mother and child.
Whatever the events were one result was dissociation. They become detached from their emotions and from themselves. In some cases there may be a distinct difference when working with memories before as compared with after a traumatic event. The child a later stages may find it hard to get in touch with his or her feelings.
It is not always one event but continuous failure of the family to attend to the infant and provide affection, love and personal acknowledgement to the child. The impact of early neglect is the same as later trauma. The child detaches from his or her own feelings and shuts down to love relationships.
The Bible speaks about core issues in the language of the human spirit and with other imagery. Bible language is often story or picture. Biblical imagery speaks in terms of life - a tree planted by water - of being in a pit or prison - and also calls for us to wake up referring to sleep. Here are some examples:
1. Prison: Luke 4:18 "He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives,"
2. Blindness: Luke 4:18 "recovery of sight to the blind,"
3. Pits and prisons: Isaiah 42: 22 "But this is a people plundered and looted, all of them trapped in pits or hidden away in prisons."
4. Pits: See the following Psalms: 88:1-8,15,18; 28:1; 30:2,3; 40:1-3; all of 142 and 143. In particular notice the complete description of Psalm 142 and 143 and the mention of "my spirit."
5. Psalm 143 uses the language of "my spirit being overwhelmed and fainting within me" - verse 4; my soul thirsting after Yahweh like a thirsty land - verse 6; as well as the imagery of going down into the pit.
John and Paula Sandford use the picture language of sleep - the slumbering spirit - or of imprisonment - the captive spirit.
Here are more characteristics of Core issues:
1. Inability to foresee the consequences of behaviour in the future and thereby make wise decisions or avoid sin;
2. Weakened ability to draw upon the good experiences of life to help one over the bad times - the good of the past seems to be forgotten;
3. Inability to receive love or register a sense of being loved or to remember being loved so that one lives with emptiness from love or the belief that they have not been loved;
4. Difficulty in benefiting from insight type counselling - understanding does not help change or control behaviour. It seems that it impossible to think our way in to goodness or love.
5. Difficulty in learning from the past (mistakes, bad decisions, punishments and scoldings) so as to correct one's behaviour. Given that one's mind and intelligence are intact if not superior, it seems that love and goodness involve more than learning from the past. Good thinking is not enough to produce good moral character.
6. Conscience or value decisions are not based on empathy with how others feel or how one's actions will effect them. Conscience (value decisions), instead, are based on laws and rules of what is right and what is wrong - life is black or white.
7. We are talking about lack of strength, life and maturity in the Human spirit resulting in emotional immaturity. Without an adult human spirit we handle situations with the emotional intelligence and strength of a child. At the core we are still in a child state.
8. One meaning of this is that we are not emotionally ready for adult intimacy and sexuality. We will approach intimacy and sexuality with the emotional capacities of a child. We may, in fact, feel more comfortable in relationships with children than adults because they match our emotional maturity and play interests.
Going Deeper in other sources:
For more about the human spirit read: 1. Watchman Knee "Releasing the Human Spirit," 2, John and Paula Sandford, "Healing the Wounded Spirit" especially their chapters on "Functions of the Human Spirit", "The Slumbering Spirit" and "the Captive Spirit."
Zoe shares her experience
Hello George, as I said my name is Zoe, I am 41 and have never been successful in any of my relationships; friendships, men, and coworkers. I went online to seek help and I learned that I am a caregiver/people pleaseing and missing the essential skills to have real, whole relationships. I am seeking help with core issues/ narcissistic injury. I am so hurt from unmet needs and a life time of broken relationships. I hope you can help, thanks.
I have always felt that I was missing something and that something made me different and that was why my relationships of all types never worked, never included, always on the outside looking in and wondering why other people had it and why I did not. Zoe
Zoe's summary of first phone session.
So my understanding and what I got out of today was that because of abandonment from a very early age I have become disconnected with myself and others, which has prevented anyone from getting in, or me being able to relate or let anyone in, thus not knowing or feeling love and emotions from others, and not being able to give love out. My core has never been formed. I also believe because of the detachment I feel that love from God and others is not for me. Have a blessed day. Zoe
Zoe's prayer to minister God's love to her inner child.
You, Zoe, are a daughter of a king, the Lord your God is your Father, your parent who loves you and has since He knit you together in your Mother's womb. See, Zoe, the great love the Father has lavished on you, that you Zoe should be called His child a child of God. And that is what I am, John 3:1.
I see myself in the Arms of the Lord, he is holding me, cradling me, doting on me, being cherished, and adored by the Lord himself. He has always been holding me according to His word, Mark 9:36. He the Lord takes you in His arms, 1 John 3:1. How great is the Love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! He gave you, Zoe, the right to become a child of His, John 1:12, born of God. The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children, Romans 8:16. God is always, and always has been, holding you Zoe. I hold fast to the image of the Lord God almighty choosing to hold me in His arms.
© copywrite George Hartwell, 2012. All rights reserved.
Keywords: Core issues such as loneliness and emptiness, human spirit.
For Sessions with George, Retreats or Phone Counseling: counselling
234-1850 for local calls in Toronto, Mississauga, Oakville
E-mail: e-mail G Hartwell